Millennials reflected in their language: the psychology of selfies, narcissism and unfounded self-confidence

Narcissists and the illusion of competence

Millennials, often referred to as ‘Generation Me’, have a reputation for celebrating themselves on social media. The public perception is clear: this generation cultivates an intense, narcissistic self-image. Scientific studies confirm that millennials are indeed more narcissistic and exhibit exceptionally high, often completely unfounded self-confidence – regardless of their actual abilities.

It is important to clearly distinguish these socio-psychological phenomena from the clinical term ‘narcissistic personality disorder’ (NPD) used in psychiatry and psychotherapy in order to avoid misunderstandings in psychotherapy. While the socially reinforced form of narcissism among millennials is self-absorbed vanity and mostly a consequence of social trends of self-representation and advertising messages (‘Because I'm worth it’), NPD is a psychological change in identity formation that is associated with significant suffering, interpersonal problems and long-term psychosocial impairments. Clinical narcissistic personality disorder is characterised by excessive grandiosity, pathological self-overestimation, severely limited empathy and a constant need for admiration.

Narcissism made measurable: language reveals egocentricity

So-called N-gram analyses, which evaluate millions of books and song lyrics, provide clear evidence that since the 1960s, self-referential terms and phrases have been increasing significantly in everyday language, reflecting the phenomenon of narcissism in society. These linguistic patterns reflect a narcissistic zeitgeist that is particularly evident among millennials: whether through endless selfies, personal status updates or detailed self-portrayals on social networks, the staging of one's own self has become a central cultural technique.

Social media: echo chambers of a narcissistic self-image

Digital technologies and social media are key drivers of this narcissistic self-representation. The ‘EgoTech’ study by the Syzygy agency provides convincing evidence that intensive users of on-demand apps, social networks and selfie culture have measurably higher levels of narcissism. Social media deliberately promotes an illusory self-confidence that is merely a pose and is hardly backed up by real achievements. Likes, followers and short-lived attention generate superficial validation that systematically leads millennials who have grown up with these media to significantly overestimate their actual abilities and aspirations.

Narcissists and unfounded self-confidence

Voices from industry and the media like to argue that millennials are simply more self-confident and open than previous generations. However, this argument overlooks a key distinction: genuine self-confidence is usually based on demonstrable achievements and skills, while narcissists often display low frustration tolerance and a tendency to be opinionated, particularly because of their fragile self-esteem. Self-obsessed millennials focus on how they are perceived by others, often bypassing developmental tasks and without any solid qualifications or substantial achievements. Today, influencers and bloggers can generate fame and influence through sheer egomania by bathing in Nutella – through self-obsessed stories, emotional narratives or mere provocation in the digital world. In today's society, the selfie phenomenon is often mistakenly presented as healthy self-confidence, but in the real world it masks fundamental inner insecurity or even existential fears that should be treated psychotherapeutically.

Attention instead of competence in social media: ‘naked self-promotion’ to the point of burnout

Modern influencer culture is just the most visible example of the confusion between narcissism and self-confidence. Here, attention and constant validation through likes and comments count in a spiral of self-expression that increasingly strives for short-term recognition and neglects sustainable personal development. This development is reinforced by algorithms that reward content that elicits the strongest possible emotional reactions – often at the expense of authentic or profound content. Young influencers quickly learn that controversy, staging or highly emotional content generate far more attention than competence or genuine expertise.

An exemplary expression of this culture are so-called ‘lifestyle influencers,’ whose reach and income are often based solely on presenting their everyday lives in the most attractive or extraordinary way possible. The often superficial aesthetics and constant portrayal of success and happiness create a cycle of unrealistic expectations and distorted self-images, both among the influencers themselves and their viewers. In this context, supposed ‘role models’ whose qualifications hardly go beyond skilful self-presentation thrive, while traditional values such as expertise, professional experience and substantial skills are becoming increasingly less important.

This development has significant consequences for society's perception of competence and success: visibility and attention are increasingly seen as guarantees of success, while sustainable development, genuine ability and long-term commitment are losing importance. Millennials are therefore not only drivers but also victims of a culture that values fleeting fame more highly than sustainable personal and professional development.

Industrial interests: Who has something against a narcissistic image of millennials?

Despite overwhelming scientific evidence, critical studies are regularly relativised or dismissed as ‘simplistic’. Behind this deliberate relativisation are often media institutions, large tech companies and industry-related research centres that have a strong economic interest in a positive image of millennials. Millennials are not only the largest target group of the digital economy, but also the main audience of the so-called ‘Big Five’ – Google, Amazon, Facebook, Apple and Microsoft. Negative attributions that portray millennials as selfish or narcissistic could directly jeopardise sales and brand loyalty. Accordingly, companies invest large sums in studies and narratives that spread an optimistic and positive image of millennials.

Millennials write the counterarguments themselves

Another critical factor is that many of the authors who vehemently relativise or even deny narcissistic tendencies among millennials are themselves members of this generation. Today's media landscape is strongly influenced by millennials – young editors, influencers and social media authors instinctively defend their generation because negative portrayals directly attack their own self-image. This internal defence strategy creates a distorted public discourse that often undermines scientific evidence and makes it difficult to gain a nuanced understanding.

Critical perspectives: the responsibility of research

Given this complex intertwining of economic interests, media influence and generational solidarity, research has a special responsibility to promote the self-esteem of young adults. Scientific findings must not be relativised in favour of a more palatable narrative. Instead, it should be clearly stated that, objectively speaking, millennials do indeed display more narcissistic traits than previous generations. Research must take a critical and independent stance in order to avoid being commercialised or exploited, especially in the context of young adult psychology.

Conclusion: The illusion of competence through narcissistic self-presentation

The facts are clear: millennials are indeed more narcissistic and tend to have a self-confidence that is rarely based on reality, which psychologists could interpret as a sign of insecurity. Social media massively reinforces this effect. Counter-studies and media relativisations are often strategically controlled by companies and institutions whose business model depends on the positive image of millennials. An honest, critical and transparent examination of the phenomenon of the narcissistic self-image of millennials is therefore essential to enable a constructive social and psychological debate about social media and the risks of digitalisation.

Sources:

• Twenge, J. M., Campbell, W. K. (2009) analyse the relationship between self-esteem and narcissistic tendencies in Generation Y. ‘The Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement’.

• Syzygy Group (2016). ‘EgoTech Study’.

• Trzesniewski, K. H., Donnellan, M. B., Robins, R. W. (2008). ‘Do today's young people really think they are so extraordinary, or is this just a reflection of the narcissistic tendencies in our society?’ An examination of secular trends in narcissism and self-enhancement shows how the psychology of millennials is influenced by social networks. Psychological Science.

• BBC Science Focus (2021) sheds light on the psychology behind the phenomenon of narcissists on social networks. ‘Is narcissism on the rise?’

• Arnett, J. J. examines the effects of narcissism on Generation Y. (2013). ‘The Evidence for Generation We and Against Generation Me.’ Emerging Adulthood.