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Is the list really helpful or just cheap filler? Bad SEO instead of better content – 12 warning signs for SEO rubbish listicles
Kitchen table psychology, listicles consisting of nothing but headlines and SEO rubbish – traffic instead of content
Introduction: Psychology on the internet between fast food and lifestyle kitsch
Psychology on social media is becoming increasingly similar to fast food: readily available, nicely packaged, but low in nutritional value. Kitchen psychology listicles in particular, which promise "12 signs" (or 10 or however many), function like convenience products for the soul. SEO-optimised, easily digestible – and in the end, all that remains is mental bloating. Search engine optimisation is mutating into the new spice that aims to make even the most bland list palatable with artificial flavouring.
They transform psychology into lifestyle kitsch. Instead of showing complexity, they sell simple templates – and that's precisely why they're so popular. It's as if every kitchen table becomes a stage for an SEO-performing lecture, where more is revealed about Google rankings than about feelings. The 404 metaphor becomes reality when you search for content and only find placeholders.
Google, SEO and the trend towards psychology without any content: how listicles work
1. The title promises
"12 signs that ..." seems like a horoscope in academic garb. The number promises order, but the reality remains chaotic. Such a headline functions like a CTA in content marketing: it wants to get clicks, regardless of whether there is any added value behind it.
Tip: Ask yourself the following question for every title: Is this about insight or just SEO? Is the headline written for the user or for the search engine?
Fact: Number headlines increase the click-through rate by up to 36%, regardless of the content. This is the ranking equivalent of sugar in soft drinks: sweet but empty.
Mistake: Anyone who believes such titles without checking them risks making unfounded self-diagnoses. A bad title promises a listicle that relies solely on keywords to rank on Google.
2. The moral cudgel
"Toxic people" or "covert narcissists" are favourite terms in clickbait psychology. They generate outrage, not insight – and turn neighbourhood disputes into pathological diagnoses. These buzzwords are placed like long-tail keywords in a blog post that only aims to appear in search results.
Fact: Terms are stigmatising when used without context. Labelling a person based on a list is not a serious approach to psychological issues.
Example: Aunt Erna is suddenly perceived as "toxic" simply because she doesn't smile at the family gathering. If someone had conducted a keyword search, "bad mood due to toothache" would have been a more effective search query.
3. Psychology as decoration
A quote from Freud, loosely sprinkled in, is like parsley on tinned ravioli. It signals depth where only superficial rhetoric exists. In the world of SEO, this is known as keyword integration: mentioning "Freud", "psyche", and "analysis" as frequently as possible so that Google perceives it as a serious article.
Fact: Freud is quoted three times more often in SEO texts than in current specialist articles.
Reasons: Big names create an aura of authority, even if the reference is missing. The list gains supposed relevance, while the content is watered down.
Mistake: Scientific decoration with buzzwords is no substitute for evidence. A format such as the listicle does not become more serious as a result.
4. The interchangeable examples
Whether it's a colleague, aunt or flatmate: they all fit the mould. Listicles are like IKEA instructions – universal, but soulless. It's as if guides in list form explain life by inserting screw A into board B.
Challenge: Recognisability is appealing, but it levels individuality. Everyone fits, so no one really fits.
Solution: Allow for ambivalence: the colleague can be exhausting and valuable. That cannot be represented with a simple list, no matter how cleverly it is formatted.
5. The pseudo-diagnosis
"If someone does X, they're not really nice." Sentences like this turn everyday observations into apparent psychiatry. In reality, they are as accurate as weather forecasts.
Fact: DSM-5 does not recognise a diagnosis of "toxic person".
Tip: Check terms against clinical classifications. If you do a keyword search here, you will quickly realise that "toxic" in a medical context has nothing to do with your girlfriend's behaviour.
6. The raised index finger
Listicles simulate certainty. No questions, no grey areas. Anyone who has doubts does not fit into the SEO system. The lists pretend to deliver ultimate truths, as if they had been ordered from the search engine god.
Fact: Real psychology thrives on questions, not assertions.
Question: When was the last time you read a text that left you with open questions? An article that invited you to think instead of diagnose?
7. The zero-risk therapy setting
No space, no eye contact, no meaningful silence. Just text. Psychology without relationship – like a fitness video that promises muscles while you eat crisps.
Benefit: Real psychotherapy creates resonance through relationship, not through lists.
Example: In a session, silence often has a more clarifying effect than 1,000 buzzwords. The list remains silent, the encounter lives on.
8. Feel-good outrage
The reader should think: "I see through the wrong ones!" A little narcissistic kick, nicely packaged as self-awareness. That's the CTA of the kitchen table psychologist: "Click me, you're smarter than everyone else!"
Gund: Indignation sells better than ambivalence.
Challenge: Expose your own need for validation.
Tip: Check whether you are reading the article to feel better or to gain a deeper understanding. Is the content there for the user or for the algorithm?
9. The recycling principle
"10 signs of envy" or "15 reasons why your ex..." – the topics revolve like the playlist at the gym. Familiar, dull, endless. It's the playlist of the content marketing world: the exact keywords, remixed.
Fact: 68% of all psychological SEO articles recycle content from other blogs (Content Marketing Institute).
Mistake: Believing that every list is original. Those who only copy build a 404 page that pretends to impart knowledge but only delivers data garbage.
10. The absence of ambivalence
Real psychology knows contradiction. Kitchen psychology listicles erase it. Ambivalence doesn't resonate – so it fades away.
Fact: Ambivalence is not a deficiency, but a human reality.
Solution: Train tolerance for ambivalence – for example, through journaling. Every doubt you experience is more relevant than a list of "yes or no" answers.
11. Therapeutic simulation
The texts sound like mini-sessions: "If you recognise this, then ..." But it all remains simulation: no resonance, no countertransference, just dummy text.
Example: A "checklist for empathy" remains simulation – empathy is experienced in conversation.
Tip: Use texts as a starting point, not as a substitute for interaction. Don't be guided by rankings, but by genuine content.
12. The SEO happy ending
"Read also: 8 tips on how to let go better." The loop runs endlessly – an assembly line of pseudo-psychological advice, like junk food that whets your appetite without filling you up.
Reason: Internal links keep readers around longer, not smarter.
Mistake: Confusing more content with more insight.
Fact: A list reassures us, but rarely does justice to the complexity of reality.
SEO vocabulary
Anyone who believes that the whole content circus stems from empathy is underestimating the mechanics involved. Behind every psychological listicle is keyword research and a marketer who peppers their headline with relevant keywords to appear in search results. The listicle format has become a trend because it is list-based: straightforward, easy to scan and ideal for placing terms such as "SEO" and "Google".
Listicles are articles built for search engines. They place many search terms in short paragraphs, combine emotional phrases with SEO techniques and hope that search engines will love them. They deliver headlines peppered with Google tricks: "List format that really works", "The checklist for SEO success". That simulates relevance. The user is looking for an answer, but only finds recycled lists.
Behind the scenes, analysis is carried out using tools such as Google Trends and Google Ads to measure the frequency of search queries. Core Web Vitals are optimised, and landing pages are created to increase visibility. Everything is strategically planned. Even the CTA ("call to action") at the end of a list is formulated to generate clicks. And depending on the industry, guides are written that are just long enough to fit into an SEO audit.
The sad truth is that these optimisation measures are no substitute for genuine analysis. Listicles are articles that seem to come out of a machine, like pop songs. They rank because they use the right words in the right places, not because they ask the right questions. Those who only chase rankings forget that their target audience is not comprised of bots, but of people seeking guidance.
Even a simple audit shows when SEO is being misused. The page appears perfect because it features an H1 with the correct keyword, but the content is empty. Even the graphics are often just decoration. A clever tool recognises this; an attentive reader senses it immediately.
And what does optimisation look like in practice? You create lists that appear comprehensive by stringing together "10 reasons", "15 tips" and "20 mistakes". You analyse the competition and discover that they all use the exact long-tail keywords. You optimise the headline to match the search intention, and you throw a Google Ads budget into the ring to get to the top in the short term. And yet, in the end, a gap remains: the difference between clicks and insights.
Do we really want to turn the kitchen of thought into a laboratory of algorithms? Search engine optimisation does not have to mean dismantling the psyche. It can be a valuable tool if used seriously: to make good content visible, rather than camouflaging lists full of buzzwords. A good blog post can contain keywords and still have depth. It can offer guidance and still be ambivalent. It can take the form of a list and still be thought-provoking when it invites us to ask questions rather than make diagnoses.
Conclusion: Why real psychology deserves more
Psychology on the internet is degenerating into an entertainment product – cheap, salty, addictive. But the human soul is not a click generator. It needs connection, resonance, irritation and doubt.
Real psychology comforts not through lists, but through encounter. When you see the next listicle, remember: it may be more about page views (traffic) than about you.
SEO listicles are list-form articles that are adapted for search engines using keyword research, optimisation measures and tools – often at the expense of content.
Listicles work, but the price is high: they reduce complex topics, promote feel-good outrage and replace dialogue with empty phrases.
The overemphasis on keywords, rankings and Google trends leads to psychological topics being reduced to kitchen wisdom aimed solely at generating traffic.
Checklists and guides are helpful when they have substance; in most cases, they serve only as decorative formats for empty phrases.
An audit of the texts helps to check relevance and added value, rather than unquestioningly focusing on rankings.
That allows you to quickly recognise whether a post is written for the user or only optimised for the search engine.
Real psychology requires relationships and ambivalence, not a list of buzzwords.
If you want to remain credible, write for people – and use SEO to make good content findable, not to confuse readers with 404 errors in content marketing.
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